When I Can't Make My Own Expression

Sometimes in life, I can't find the words for what I am feeling. I dated this great guy a year ago, and we called it off after a few months. We were in different places, but are still really good friends, who still do a lot together. It was like we were together, but without the title. I have held the hope that we might get back together, but last weekend he told me that he has had 4 realtionships, and no desire for another. It came as a blow, but I understand and support his position. Our friendship is not going to change, but I could not find the words to how I am feeling, til I found this. This is Jose Gonzeles and his cover of Heartbeats.



one night to be confused
one night to speed up truth
we had a promise made
four hands and then away

both under influense
we had devine scent
to know what to say
mind is a razorblade

to call for hands of above
to lean on
wouldn't be good enough
for me, no

one night of magic rush
the start a simple touch
one night to push and scream
and then releaf

ten days of perfect tunes
the colors red and blue
we had a promise made
we were in love

to call for hands of above
to lean on
wouldn't be good enough
for me, no

to call for hands of above
to lean on
wouldn't be good enough

and you, you knew the hands of the devil
and you, kept us awake with wolf teeths
sharing different heartbeats
in one night

to call for hands of above
to lean on
wouldn't be good enough
for me, no

to call for hands of above
to lean on
wouldn't be good enough
for me, no

Hmmmm.....a poll

The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) has released a new poll that shows most U.S. adults support legal protections for gay and transgender people.

75 percent support marriage, domestic partnerships or civil unions for same-sex couples. But only 47 percent are in favor of gay marriage, with 49 percent opposed.

64 percent favor allowing openly gay people to serve in the military.

63 percent back expanding hate-crime laws to protect gay and transgender people.

51 percent favor fair housing, employment and public-accommodation laws for gay and transgender people.

69 percent oppose laws that ban qualified gay and lesbian couples from adopting children. (Utah has such a statute.)

Source » GLAAD's Pulse of Equality Survey. Harris Interactive interviewed 2,008 U.S. adults by phone Nov. 13-17. The survey has a margin of error of 2 percent.

I Need To Be Able To Call You Whora Esquire

To my dear friend Julie, aka Whora, just wanted to wish you the very best when you take your LSAT tomorrow.

Prop 8 The Musical

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

For Old Times Sake

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

If You Need To Shake Your Tail

I Extend My Middle Finger Salute

Only it Utah. Here is the latest on Sen Chris Buttars, notorious for racist and socially irresponsible comments on the Utah Senate Floor:

Sen. Chris Buttars wants Utah's Legislature to declare its opposition to the "war on Christmas."

The West Jordan Republican is sponsoring a resolution encouraging retailers to embrace Christmas in their promotions rather than the generic "holidays."

"It would encourage the use of 'Merry Christmas,'" Buttars said of the non-binding statement that is still being drafted. "I'm sick of the Christmas wars -- we're a Christian nation and ought to use the word."

Several fellow lawmakers he wouldn't yet name support his effort, added Buttars, who has a long history of championing the socially conservative agenda of the Utah Eagle Forum.

In 2005, right-wing pundit Bill O'Reilly took on the same fight, characterizing the so-called war on Christmas as part of a secular progressive agenda that would open the door to legalized drugs, abortion-on-demand and same-sex marriage.

One advertising executive thinks the Buttars message crosses the line.

"I'm kind of flabbergasted that there is even such a proposal," said Dave Newbold, president of Salt Lake City-based Richter7 Advertising and Public Relations.

"We may be primarily Christian but that doesn't mean that you force your language or beliefs on anybody," Newbold added. "We live in a multicultural area and it's right and proper to be sensitive to the various cultures."

Implementing such a resolution would be challenging, said Jim Olsen, president of the 350-member Utah Retail Advertisement Merchants Association.

"A number of our members are national in nature and their ads, signage and promotions are done at a national level," Olsen said. "Any time we have states encouraging us to deviate from those national programs, it begins to cause problems."

Lawmakers were hesitant to weigh in on a measure they had not seen.

"I think Christmas is a wonderful holiday," said Sen. Curt Bramble, R-Provo. "Am I supporting the legislative action? I'll have to read it first."

While Bramble believes that America is grounded in Judeo-Christian beliefs, part of that thinking involves tolerance of other faiths, he said.

"I don't find it offensive when someone says 'Happy Holidays,' " Bramble added. "What is offensive is if we're embarrassed to say 'Merry Christmas.' "

Rep. David Litvack, a Jewish Democrat who represents part of Salt Lake City, said he's fine with people wishing him a Merry Christmas. However, he wonders if constituents really want their representatives spending time on such matters.

"There are many more pressing issues that we've been elected to address," Litvack said. "We're a nation of many faiths and we as leaders should be finding ways to build common ground and respect, not entrenching one side over another."

The resolution could violate First Amendment rights depending on the motivation behind it, said Salt Lake City civil rights attorney Brian Barnard.

"What he's doing is kind of silly but it doesn't ring a bell as a violation of separation of church and state," Barnard said.

However, if Buttars bases the resolution on America being a Christian nation, that moves the measure over the line, Barnard said.

"Our country was not founded by a bunch of Christians," Barnard said. "They were people concerned about religious freedoms."

"If [Buttars] wants people to say 'Merry Christmas' because it's the Christian thing to do," Barnard added, "then it becomes a violation of First Amendment rights."

World AIDS Day

I am a big fan of the message and comment boards on Utah publication and news web sites such as KSL.com, and sltrib.com. I am even a bigger fan of those boards when the are stories concerning the gays and lesbians and HIV and AIDS. Being that today is World AIDS Day, I thought I would share a few of the more truely ignorant comments:

Notice how the gays who have become the unwelcome visitors in our forums of late are strangely quiet on this one, well that's not a surprise. It was gay sex that was largely responsible for turning AIDS into the huge killer that it was here in America before the anti-viral cocktail became available. Anybody else need additional bad news before you decide that anal sex isn't a good idea, hetero or homosexual.

Finally, if this is accepted or not, believed or not, THE LORD GOD always wins and this is the heavenly truth to which AMBUSH was divinely given to mankind for the CURE of HIV/AIDS and it will be here forever. Apostle Shada Mishe.

WOW!!!! Considering that Utah is the cradle for Jesus Freaks, I am amazed with the outpouring of hate and misunderstanding aimed at those with HIV and AIDS. HIV and AIDS are NOT a gay disease and I am sure their beloved Lord and Savior would slap the crap out those who think so or say that the gays deserve it. I am gay and I am HIV+. I did not get it from being gay, not is it punishment from an almighty god. I think some people need to do a little research on issues such as HIV and AIDS before posting comments that only make them look like Hitler, Saddam Hussein, George W Bush, Gargamel from the Smurfs, Skelator, Mummra.....you get the point. I think it was that Jesus dude that said, "for as I have loved you......love one another.